Feet in the Sand

 The sand between my toes

As I hold my shoes 

Walking along the shore

Listening to the crashing of the waves

Seeing the ripples of the water 

Stopping looking at the horizon

Thinking

Processing

The sun beginning to set

I sit on the sand 

Out of reach of the waves

Feet dug in

Arms wrapped around my legs

I close my eyes

To feel a warm breeze

The waves slowing

Receding

The warm breeze turns to cool

As night begins

The rolling whites is visible

For nothing much can be seen

No nightlife

Only crashing against the land

Wanting to bury these feelings

Like my feet are buried in the sand

Maybe my emotions

Can be taken out to sea

Still I sit

Listening 

Rolling waves so violent

Yet so calming

Are like the emotions deep within

Wanting to scream

Only to feel something

I’m like the sand

The grains mixed up

Swirling in the water

Trying to drown at sea

Somehow they stay with me

For it’s never that easy

Only if I could feel

Like I feel the sand

The Ocean

Crashing waves

Blue and whites intertwine 

With energy undeniable

Forceful life that crashes in

Grains of sand slowly go out to sea

As the water picks it up

As if it weighs nothing

Watching the sand cling to the ground

Off it goes

To a world beyond we do not see

Everything on the beach drowning

As the whites of the waves come in

Scooping up life

With nothing to hold on to

You are left scratching at nothing

Claw marks are left in the sand

Only to be washed away 

just a second later

Unable to breathe

As the currents pull you in

Gasping for breath

Fighting a world you don’t belong in

One breath

Down again

Pulled down once again

Currents stronger than before

Grabbing at something 

Nothing is there

Trying to survive

For survival isn’t there

No matter how hard you try

Two breaths

Fighting again

Unable to scream

Down again we go

A cycle unable to be broken

Current racing around 

No time to breathe

No time to stop

Just the vast energy 

Radiating from such force

Three breaths

Finally, maybe

Never any time

Continuing to sea

No place to go

Like a boat in a bottle

Stuck 

Only in hopes to be free

The strength is running out

Willing to fight is leaving

Keep swimming

Against an Unbreakable current

Maybe there is a break

A way to escape 

This vast amount of water

For only to keep drowning in

Still no time

Once I am released

From the grips of the sea

Tiring attempts against the currents

I have to breathe

Somehow I have too

I will not survive

Breathing

Barely alive

The ocean hasn’t drowned me

Only it came close

I Joked About You

I joke about you

Pretend that we are friends

Yet you are locked away most days

Today pounding on the glass

Wanting to escape

How such a black shadowy figure

Can make so much noise

Somehow you scream louder than me

Wanting out

Having me joke about drinking things

Oh the ideations that creep in

There was a crack

How did I let you in

The unknown of the source

The glass rattles

As bang harder

Screaming to be let free

Those who look close enough

May just see

For the eyes are a window

The window is where you are at

Making yourself known

No longer behind the curtain

Standing there

Getting my attention

You hear those words

I am fine

Escape these lips

As you had hoped

For you know

I say it enough

The games will start

A game to you

Is a war for me

A power struggle

Of who will win

The defeat won’t happen

Til I am bloody and bruised

A fight I constantly push against

A game you love to play

Being bloody and bruised 

Is how you like me

You’ll whisper in my ear

The things I love to hear

Being to weak

I’ll listen

Only too closely

Your darkness

Will slowly consume me

Like the smokey demon you are

Breathless

Your raspy voice will share your thoughts

Begin to poke and prod

No energy to force you back

The window is open for all to see

Trapped that you are

How much longer will you be trapped

For the answer is unknown

I have fight in me

Before your game starts

We both know how this goes

Only one always survives