Overthinking

 Written 8/13/2023

I hear myself saying I am too much

I have smothered you 

With my words

The way I act

I feel like I am a burden 

Being told I’m co-depending

Only to pull inward more

Tell you everything is fine

You look at me

Tell me I’m ok

I can trust you

Be open with you

All I hear is the voices in my head

Telling me that I’m not good enough

Good enough to be open

If I am open

I am now too much

I am too negative 

Feelings of insecurity creep up

Hearing words of anger

Only they don’t escape your mouth

I feel the unimportant 

Only to see you gave up on me

I have to open my eyes

I need to see the truth

Someone standing there

Arms stretched

Reminding me it’s ok

All I can do is remind them

Who I am

I overthink when I am scared

Overwhelmed 

Insecure 

Feeling like I was just abandoned 

Those feelings don’t just go away

I hear a person telling me to stop

Stop talking about the past

Telling me stay quiet

Not ask questions 

Move on without a word

Only to see that the voice is in my head

A dark memory

That was buried in my head

Reminding me

That love beats the negative 

The thoughts that are runnings deep

My back is covered

No matter how I turn

I have you

I always have