Emotions

 I know I am shutting down

Closing the trust we built

I don’t know anymore

What is in store of us

In three months

A year

Will you still be here

I feel this shift happening

One I wish I didn’t feel

Big emotions are trying to surface

Instead I bury them

I want to tell everyone I’m fine

There isn’t anything anyone can do

I’m forcing myself to eat

The nausea hits me hard

What can I do

Not to be hunched over

Crying and screaming

Trying to believe every word you say

Yet not believing you at all

Written 8/30/2026

Do I Matter

 Do I matter

Do you care about my thoughts

Right now I don’t know

I feel like I’m in the open

Searching

Trying to survive 

Find comfort

In something that doesn’t exist 

Your hand is too far to reach

Do my words count

At least for something

Are you willing to fight for me

No matter the cost

I hear the battle being lost

As the storm is blowing through

Do you even need me

Your life is so busy

It’s like I’m not there

Your words have changed

I don’t know if you do

Not like I need you

I want you as the flowers need air

We need food

I want you in many ways

Do you want the same

Am I an object 

One to watch from afar

Am I this person

You only come too

When your life is hard

Forget about when it’s easy

I’ll be there to pick you up

Tell you the words you want to hear

Appreciate the little things

Breathe life into you

Do I matter

Enough to always be there

Lean on

The good and the bad

Do I no longer matter

Is it

I never did in the first place 

Written 8/31/26

Another Season

 The colors of leaves change

The air begins to cool

Signs of fall are right around the corner

Screaming fans

Smells of grills 

Rolling through the air

For it’s that time of year

Where the world shifts

Changes

Another season

Not just for the world

For me too

Another year older

Another candle blown out

A year of laughter

Tears

Heartache

All are left behind

More tears form

More laughter comes

Mask forms

Trying to play make believe 

For this is just another act

In a play called life

Shadows begins to creep

Sounds go still

Leaves fall to the ground

Laughter goes quiet

Tears begin to fall

Corners of mine go dark

The demons try and escape

As I sit and scream

Then go silent

Another year 

Another season