Not Worth It

 I am a girl

Who is not worthy

Not worthy of love

Not worthy of anything

 

I am hurt

I am damaged

I am raw

I am battered

I am scared

 

Most days I have no name

I am a mom

I am a wife

I am a daughter

I am not my name

 

I am not what you want

For I am not the model

You so desire

I am not worthy of you

 

I am not worth your love

Your affection

Your desire

Your anything

For I am not the one you crave

 

I am not the person

You have wished for me to be

You remind me daily

Of the person I once was

 

For I am not a good mother

Even a good wife

Most days I feel

Like I failed as a friend

 

So I am not worthy

Of the love that you give

I am not worth the conversation

You want to hold with me

 

You snap

You yell

You tell me I’m wrong

You tell me how I have failed you

Even how I failed as a mom

 

So for you can see

I am not worth it

I am not worthy for anyone

Who may want in

 

Written: 2018